THREE MEN IN A BOAT!

SUNNY THOMAS

Arun Jaitley does not relish making mistakes, unlike some of his party colleagues. His statements seldom carry any faux pas that needs clarification upon clarification. He commands respect across the country, more respect perhaps outside the party than inside the party that has failed to make the best use of his leadership qualities. Jaitley is Vajpayee in the making, acceptable to all sections of society and ideological spectrum. 

Akhilesh Yadav’s transformation from a gangster kingpin to a mature statesman overnight deserves our attention. It speaks of his enormous latent potential, and the advantage of a good education abroad and his innate adaptability to UP politics. He, too, does not make any faux pas, nor meddle in other people’s affairs. With UP in his pocket and with the right alliance, Delhi is not out of reach for the young Yadav.         

Rahul Gandhi is strikingly different from Jaitley and Yadav in that the latter two are cautious players while the former is prone to making mistakes. Yet Rahul commands more goodwill than Jiatley and Yadav put together, though the goodwill has yet to be translated into votes. On Rahul lies the onerous responsibility of keeping the hopes of his party alive, a party that is fast disappearing from many parts of India. It will take a miracle for Congress to retain a respectable margin in the next general election – an economic miracle where prices are brought down to a comfortable level for the middle class who determines their next rulers. Nor just prices but jobs for the millions who pass out of educational institutions and teaching shops, with hopes and fears. Not just jobs but sops for the poorest of the poor living in squalor and misery, who could be cannon fodder for Maoists. If Manmohan Singh skilfully fine-tunes his economics to make it middleclass-centric, Congress can hope for a hat-trick in 2014 (however dismal the chances may look now).  

The three men have one notable distinction: they defy Didification, Ammafication and Modification – the three mine traps of Indian democracy. All the three are very young, intelligent, articulate, and have a future vision. If only these three men could meet and blueprint a common vision for India 2022, it could signal a Renaissance in Indian politics. The destiny of this nation cannot be entrusted to one political party alone, however well-intentioned it may be. Thinking the impossible and creating the impossible is what good politics is all about. And the people should be constantly on their guard so that they don’t entrust their children’s future to a pack of demagogues and power-hungry wolves!   

Leander Paes is stabbed! Imagine this headline is screeched at you by your favourite anchor of your favourite television channel. You take it with a pinch of salt. No Indian in his right sense would venture to assault a star about to participate in Olympics. Then how come we hear of betrayal and back-stabbing of Leander Paes by his fellow tennis players? All we know is that Mahesh Bhupathi and Paes have not been at peace with each other, rather they were not eve on talking terms for several years but played their match together. Their animosity is their private affair but broadcast to the nation by TRP-hunting television channels. But what’s intriguing is the lack of enthusiasm of two tennis aces – Rohan Bopanna and Sania Mirza, one of whom refused directly and forthrightly while the other indirectly and forthrightly expressing her wrath at the All-India Tennis Association which has not even bothered to congratulate her on her recent victory but use players as pawns of its convenience

The Tennis Association deserves congratulations for upsetting four top players at one stroke! But one is reasonably certain that the reluctance of the three players has less to do with sports and more to do with their chemistry. Tennis buffs may recall how Monica Seles, at the height of her career, was stabbed after a game but escaped death almost miraculously. Fame and fortune invites not only bouquets but also knives!    

A Presidential ordinance asking Bhupathi and Mahesh to patch for Olympics would turn sports into politics. Good luck to Peas, good luck Bhupathi, Bopanna and Mirza!

Mrs Malaprop is looking for a tutor to teach her daughter geography so that she could get good marks in Maths. While sifting the grain, she got a kidney stone which she removed herself and put it into the dustbin. Her husband saw a gynecologist for his gastric problems. Her omniscient younger daughter failed in science because her thermometer went up due to fever. Even as you are reading this column, Mrs Malaprop is taking myopia to get her vision rectified!