THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA!
SUNNY THOMAS
My computer has joined Mamata, Mulayam, Jaya and the Big Wigs
of BJP, all prime ministerial aspirants, much against my wishes. It has joined
the nation-wide protest against the Prime Minister’s betrayal of the people,
who have elected him to cushion them off against the turbulence of the global
economy. Instead, he is protecting the looters and the hooters of our nation – the
looters who plunder our natural resources and the hooters who spread the canard
that the Indian economy is going to be downgraded unless FDI is granted entry
permit that sent shivers down the spines of the economist Prime Minister.
You don’t seem to understand my problem, which is personal.
There is no way my computer will type the Prime Minister’s name correctly. Ever
since the diesel price hike, my computer types Manmohan SIN instead. In panic, I called an expert who instantly
diagnosed it as computer virus. On his recommendation, I bought a double
anti-virus but my computer was defiant. I called another expert who recommended
a double-double anti-virus, and, lo and behold, it totally blacks out our
venerable coal minister’s name!
A fifty per cent roll back might prompt my computer typing
Manmohan SING instead of that horrendous surname. Any day, it sounds better
than FDI SING. I am absolutely certain that my computer won’t budge till there
is a total rollback, and in that case Mamata might roll back her protests, and the
allies might become allies once again, as if there was no diesel price hike and
no Mamata protests. And my computer might start working as though it never
struck work.
Shadow prime ministers already live in 2014, and Mamata’s
outburst on television cameras was her address to the nation. Through her Pro-Poor
Rhetoric, she was declaring herself leader of the fourth front that would take
her to the PMO. Mulayam, leader of the
third front, has already declared that he is not a saint, or to speak the
language of Barkis in David Copperfield,
Malayam is willin’. Jaya, leader of the fifth front, is busy with Kudankulam
nuclear plant, and will always welcome any event that would catapult her to the
PMO.
Modi’s diatribes make him fit for Gujarat, and totally unfit
for outside Gujarat. Nitish Kumar, the most qualified man for the Prime Minister’s
job, has proved his courage of conviction by daring Modi and Raj Thackeray.
Think of the jam UPA got stuck in. If they (Cong men) accept
all that Mamata demands (a complete roll back and FDI in cold storage), the
Prime Minister would be reduced to a lame duck. UPA’s options are jettison the
Reforms Agenda (with or without the Prime Minister) for a Pro-Poor Image and
share the platform with Mamata, or boldly adopt a Pro-Reforms Agenda and face the
consequences.
Congress is in a Catch 22 situation. In power, BJP would
adopt the same reforms they are opposing now, of course, with some
window-dressing, and take the credit for leading the country to the path of
employment and prosperity. If UPA adopts
a Pro-Poor Platform with Mamata, the gains are instant but short term. Ruined
if they don’t reform, and ruined if they do.
After the television drama, things would settle down and the allies
would be allies once again, with some give and take (or even if they support
from outside because Trinamool Congress ministers were not contributing to good
governance, any way). After the coal scam, Adarsh scam, 2G scam, and
Commonwealth scam, there is no question of the PM losing his face. And in 2014,
he would demit office as the happiest Prime Minister ever – because he doesn’t
have to deal with Mamata any more!
Like Santiago, in Hemingway’s The Old Man and the Sea,
the Prime Minister would realize that politics (life) is an empty shell. All
that would remain in his grip would be the skeleton of the economic reforms as
Santiago’s giant fish that he caught and fought to bring it to the shore.
