MONKEY POLITICS AND 

MONKEY DEBATES! 

SUNNY THOMAS

A monkey gives amusement to his spectators. After Anna Hazare, the Charlie Chaplin of Indian politics, it’s the turn of Arvind Kejriwal to entertain his spectators. While Charlie Chaplin’s trademark was his ill-fitting dresses, Anna’s incongruity lies in the grotesque mismatch between the ground reality of thinning crowds (to a handful) and his pretensions to being the father of the nation!  After his honest friends deserted him, Kejriwal started a political party to cleanse the system of corruption, for which he has neither the caliber nor the character. 

If Kejriwal loses his deposit in the next election and Suresh Kalmadi of Commonwealth Games fame wins with a record margin, whom will you blame? The Indian Constitution, the Commonwealth, or his own dismal record? Diabolical games will always end in a fiasco, it might amuse some for a while, though.  

After losing its relevance in the national gladiator show, the all-India Mamata party has decided to have a conclave with the all-India Jayalalithaa party and the all-India Mulayam party and the all-India Naveen party to roadblock multinationals from entering retail trade that might end farmers’ committing suicide.   

The all-Sri Lanka Karuna party and the all-India cyber party of Chandu Babu, and even the Iceland party of Marxists are not invited, for they are unlikely to support a no-confidence motion against the Manmohan Singh government. Even if they do, there are reasons of animosity.  

Once bitten twice shy, BJP has become wiser. It knows that no-confidence motion only strengthens Congress – this time a no-confidence motion may even double the Congress majority! Just think of it, with all the coalmines under its thump, and the purchasing power of MPs almost at the same rate as last time, the astute floor managers of Congress will ensure its resounding victory. But it’s all right for all-India Mamata party to whine and moan!!   

And every time there is a monkey show, our television channels vie with each other to give a full coverage, followed by a monkey debate where the most intelligent is hardly given time to speak and the brainless buffoons dominate the show. In fact, these political shows are exclusively designed for the TV cameras, and will come to an end once the cameras shun the show.  

Can a government of liars, for liars and by liars do any good for a country of 1.2 billion? By constantly vituperating against a government that has taxed the people beyond the endurance level, the Opposition parties are creating UPA III indispensible!    

American democracy is tilting towards Plutocracy where the poor subsidise the rich! The rich invest and create jobs – at least, that’s what the Republicans believe. The Democrats tax the rich and bring the much needed social security and health care. But not all federal funds are wisely spent, creating discontent. The outcome of an American election much depends on the business cycle of boom and bust. That explains why some mediocre Presidents get two terms while some more deserving ones wilt after one term. Bill Clinton has managed the economy so well, and kept the unemployment rate so low that his Presidency is fondly remembered.  

After Abe Lincoln, Barak Obama is the only President to have risen from such humble origin.  Many White Americans felt during the last election that it was their duty to right the wrong by electing a Blackman in the White House. But the Obama magic has waned – notwithstanding his Nobel Prize and His prized trophy, Osama Bin Laden’s head. What is surprising is that a political lightweight like Mitt Romney is running neck and neck with the President who deserves a second term. Will the anger of the unemployed tip the scale of the verdict? Come November, things could change!